Fesshole 🧻

I took my girlfriend's dad's car to the pub one night without anybody knowing. I met another girl and we had sex on the back seat. Accidentally left the condom wrapper in the car which my exes dad got the blame for. Him and his wife divorced not long after.

Last year my parents resolved the Abilene paradox in our marriage. After 7 years we all had Xmas together and I roasted a turkey. They asked why. I said my husband and the kids like it. They all said they were enduring it for me. We all hate turkey. This year we're having lamb.

Family deaths means this year I am facing my first Christmas alone. Assured friends I won't spend it by myself and I've got social plans. But I don't. I'm going to put up a little tree and some tinsel, have a crate of beer and a curry and watch reruns of Blake's 7. Fucking bliss.

I'm a trans woman who, if anyone ever asks, will give my deadname as a different male name each time. It's been the single fastest way to find people who talk behind my back. If that name leaks I know just who leaked it and just who to instant block forever.

My other half is pushing me to go to the doctors to investigate my insomnia. I don't have insomnia, I just stay up stupidly late because that's the only time where I don't have a man/child/dog/cat/parent/friend bothering me for stuff and I can read/sew/play games in peace.

Every time I use a hire by the hour car, the last thing I do before leaving it is to set the menu options into the most obscure language I can find in the system, a cryptic challenge for the next guy

Catch Fesshole Live in Leicester, Luton and Leeds – tickets available now! We’re off to Sweden too, visiting Malmö, Göteborg and Stockholm, and bringing Anon Opin to Leicester.

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Fesshole LIVE is me Rob Manuel who created @fesshole making it into a live comedy show. People ask what to expect? It's a show of two halves and th...

Wife caught our teenage son pissing in the sink while he brushed his teeth. I couldn't get too mad at him because I do the same thing.

Neurologist here. Years ago one of our patients had a brief loss of consciousness. When he woke up, I told him it was 3 years later. Our head nurse added "and your wife has left you."

Kind of a boring one but I used to "adopt" abandoned sections of green between roadways, come in, remove invasive plants & then spread seeds for native ones. Illegal sure, but mundane. It was fun though.