☕🌼 sunny day, excellent.
So... A thought...
Everyone who used bitcoin as collateral for debt got, or is getting, rekt right now. There was a time when that could have been me. I knew I didn't like debt, but I didn't hate it, and part of the fascinating world of bitcoin is this temptation, that you could borrow against the btc you have to get even more. Its an extra tempting thought because it allows you to indulge in the story that you're an uncompromising stoic bitcoiner. In my case, I was saved by procrastination. I had it all set up. It would've been like 4 more clicks. But then I just... Didn't.
Instead, I went into one of those fugue states, where a kind of hazy ineptitude loses ground to a loss of purpose. These states really should be studied, if they're not... Some indeterminate period later (certainly not less than many months), I found my focus, my energy came back, and I had... upgrades. Ownership of my own keys was one. A recalibration of trust, another. And a kind of hatred - not the burning kind, but more like the disgust after accidentally swallowing a bug - for debt. And I *think* my shift to philosophy mostly happened there. Hard to tell. How does one think in the fugue state? Who's doing the thinking? Anyways. I closed out all that stuff I did, and just thanked God for all kinds of reasons that resist linguistic capture.
The point of this? I guess its that you never know what is going to work towards a greater good. You think you're lazy? Maybe that laziness is saving you from a horror that you only recognize subconsciously. Maybe its God. Even the parts of yourself that you despise are what got you to where you currently are. Society is constantly bashing us over the head with expectations - who you could be, should be, what you deserve, what would be better, etc. That's all junk. Truly, if you could live up to those expectations, you would actually be worse off. Stop fighting yourself. If you need to go into a dark phase for a while and lose yourself in despair and self loathing, then let it happen - even that is better than becoming the image of perfection that society puts in our minds, which is actually foolishness and ruin.
I could go on. Judgement, knowledge, etc. Its all really just a linguistically dressed up foolery. And fuck debt. Seriously, fuck that.
#Thoughts need more #coffee 🐍