#Spotted on the Market Day Before Christmas in Aotearoa New Zealand:
A cheerful Pomeranian is rotating in a skipping circle below a hotdog being eaten by its human.
Perpetual Motion Dog is generating more energy than it's consuming.
If only science could harness this power for good!
A young human (5?) in grinch themed T-shirt and shorts is holding up a Bundaberg ginger beer to his little sister, saying officiously: "Cheers!" and then instructing her imperiously that she has to say "Cheers!" back or it "Doesn't WORK!"
Little Sister is looking pugnaciously skeptical.
A man (30s?) is studying some earrings with a cheerful smile. He looks down at his small human (4?) in a Spiderman t-shirt and asks: "Which ones d'you think Nana would like?"
Small Human Spiderman gives him an incredulous look before roaring: "The PRETTY ONES!"
Some things are just obvious.
A tiny human is putting on a full sturm und drang performance.
Hand beseechingly raised to Mum.
Face a picture of tearful fury as she bellows: "I WANT STRAWBERRIES!"
Mum says wryly. "You've GOT strawberries in your lap Bub."
"BUT I WANT OTHER STRAWBERRIES."
The strawberry struggle is real.
A pâtissier (30s?) stops his partner from offering their last madeleine to customers because it's already taken. Moments later, a very serious looking small human (3?) arrives with his Mum and accepts his weekly madeleine treat with a solemn high five and a hug.
Pâtissier beaming.
(Continued Below)
It's almost my 2 year anniversary of posting spotted observations of life in Aotearoa New Zealand, so I thought it would be fun for today's post to be the one that kicked it all off. It might explain why we immediately fell in love with this awesome little city that we now call home.❤️🌺
Here we go:
#Spotted Before Christmas 2023 in a Small City in Aotearoa New Zealand:
A woman (80s?) is drawing willies wearing Santa hats on the walls of a public loo. She's emphatically explaining that they: "represent life's funny little ways".
In a garden centre: A sweaty looking man (50s?) bellows: "Darl, you like flowery shit, right?" into his phone, at presumably the love of his life.
Her profanity is audible and delightful for onlookers.
A woman (20s?) is standing in the cheese section of a supermarket, obviously completely overwhelmed.
A sales assistant comes up, puts a hand on her shoulder and says: "It's all gonna be okay, love. In five days it'll all just be indigestion. You'll do fine."
A dad (40s?) is giving his small human (5?) a very serious lecture about the importance of getting his mum the perfect watering can.
Two brothers (14 & 16?) are having a whisper-argument over whether or not the younger one is a "dick" for wanting to get their mum a boxing game for Christmas (That he totally wanted to play.) They compromise on soap by the time they get to checkout.
(Continued Below)
#Spotted While Christmas Shopping in Aotearoa New Zealand:
A small human (3?) is marching ahead of Mum in a fruit and vege shop.
Mum is taking AGES and Small Human is waving a banana towards the door like a mighty scepter.
But she isn't getting the hint!
Hmm...
Maybe a leek would work better!
A tiny human (2?) has decided that the ONLY way she can get around a department store is by wrapping herself around Dad's leg.
Dad holds up a fluffy blue bathrobe and asks: "You think Mum'll like this one?"
Tiny Human Limpet looks up and nods her approval and goes back to limpetting.
A man (50s?) is standing in front of a display of cauliflowers, his face scrunched up in worry.
He picks up one, then another, then another.
His partner wraps an arm around his waist and says: "You can't go wrong, love. They all taste like kerosine to me," and gives him a kiss on the cheek.
A big burly man (60s?) is hailed by a friend in a hardware store.
Friend asks: "Ya doin' anything interestin' lately bro?"
Burly Man's face creases in a huge smile: "Fuck yeah bro. I'm goin' to the theatre. I love a bit of theatre. Blood and gore and Shakespeare! Wanna come?"
A small human (4?) has decided that she does not want the ice cream she's asked for.
But what is this?
Dad saying he'll eat HER ice cream because she doesn't want it.
She will MOST DEFINITELY see about that.
Ice cream headache be dammed, she'll eat the lot in one bite!
(Or try to.)
(Continued Below)
#Spotted Recently While Roaming in Aotearoa New Zealand:
A young human (9?) is walking through a shopping arcade at Mum's side.
Suddenly she realizes that all the floor tiles are an imaginary hopscotch grid! (Yay!)
She hops ahead, roaring back over her shoulder for Mum to copy.
(Mum does.)
A small human (3?) has decided that colouring in is nonsense.
She does not approve of her pencils.
She does not approve of her colouring in book and she CERTAINLY does not approve of her big brother colouring in the lines.
Maybe scribbling on his page would make things more interesting...
A tiny human (2?) is watching Christmas carollers sing.
Tiny Human is showing all signs of enjoyment but something is missing...
She frowns.
Hmm...
Maybe... a finger up her nose would amplify this experience?
Problem solved, she gets on with watching the show.
A tiny human (2?) in a fairy costume is stomping along a busy footpath.
Tiny Human Fairy is wielding a Christmas lily like a magic wand and is waving it around with much abandon.
A Christmas spell here...
A Christmas spell there...
Fairying is a tough job but she's got it covered.
In a toy shop, a small human (6?) is closely examining the plastic animal display with a fierce frown.
Mum asks if he's decided and he gives her a decisive nod.
"I'm getting the whale for Grandad and the pterodactyl for Granny."
Mum agrees that these are all admirable Christmas gift choices.
(Continued Below)
#Spotted While Roaming in Aotearoa New Zealand:
A woman (20s?) is walking down the street with a GIANT armful of tinsel that's doing its best to escape.
Red, green and gold delightful nonsense going everywhere!
Passers-by sharing her laughter as they go about their day.
A teen (13?) is standing before a music shop window.
Nodding to a blue electric guitar and talking to his friend with a thoughtful voice he says, "I reckon I could learn that in a month. Whadd'ya think?"
His friend nods. "More like weeks, eh."
Satisfied with this conclusion, they walk on.
A woman (30s?) greets a friend in the street with a hug, asking: "Christmas shopping?"
Her friend nods: "Yeah. We're doing op shop* Christmas again this year. We did it last year and it was AWESOME."
A man (20s?) wearing board shorts, a yellow T-shirt and jandals* is standing at the back of a small camper van parked in a bustling street. He's got the back open and is brewing a pot of coffee on a small stove.
Vibe totally chill as people walk briskly by at the end of a busy work day.
A small human (6?) has lost the use of his legs!
(Oh no!)
They're tucked up under his T-shirt and he can't POSSIBLY leave the park and get in the car.
Mum does not seem convinced by his very convincing argument and is poking him in the ribs to tickle him.
Giggle snorts ringing through the air.
(Continued Below)