Just checking in to let everyone know I'm doing okay. Recovery is proceeding normally. Which means it's slooooow AF. As anyone else with a new va-jay-jay can tell you, healing cannot and should not be hurried. I've been without my full-time caregiver for almost two weeks now (she was great!) but, thankfully, my son has been a mensch chauffeuring me to post-op appointments, buying me groceries and cleaning my apartment. At least when he can be here. My nephew has spent a few full days keeping me company, doing some chores, picking up takeout food and watching TV with me. (Last night it was "The Batman." Ladies, Robert Pattinson is almost too pretty for that role.) When I was still in hospital, I was not only visited by @💜💜 Jessica 💜💜, but @Nicola Elle 🏳️‍⚧️ spent an entire day with me. Much appreciated and thanks for the coffee! Last week I was visited by the awesome [@Reborn_Cat_Mom_V2](

beige.party

A Very Useful Bottom Lesbian (@Reborn_Cat_Mom_V2@beige.party)

349 Posts, 116 Following, 137 Followers · Still “Approaching Tiffany Levels of Useless Lesbian.” Girl who is navigating the transition of ass...

) and we had tasty ramen and sooooo much girl talk for lunch. Also much appreciated! Still, most of my days are pretty boring, punctuated by half-hour dilation sessions and then changing pads and gauze. If you know, you know. I'm actually sitting (almost) upright at my desktop PC typing this thanks to a reclining office chair and a waffle cushion. Pro tip: remember to keep your waffle cushion inflated for maximum comfort. But I can't sit like this for very long. Probably 10 or 15 minutes at most. And then... I'm sore and/or I run out of spoons. Actually, I run out of spoons a LOT these days. My stamina is, of course, improving but it's still nowhere near normal. Thems the breaks. Eventually I'll get back to mega boosting on my @Lisa Melton account but it very likely won't be until the end of the year, if that soon. Until then, know that I miss you all and appreciate your multiple well wishes. You are good people and I'm fortunate to know you. Love, Lisa 🤗🥰💖

I didn't post this yesterday after my first post-op doctor appointment because I was exhausted from all the activitiy. The good news is that I'm no longer dragging Igor, my catheter bag, around wherever I go! Yesterday I passed the pee test quickly and with flying colors, evacuating 200 ml of fluid from the 220 ml that I received in my bladder. Basically, I was able to pee as soon as I sat down on the toilet. The bad news is that I have to get up, sometimes in the midde of the night, to pee now. Which means spritzing with the peri bottle afterwards well as changing my small gauze dressing and pad. Then again, the whole process is kinda gender affirming. I also learned how to dilate my new va-ja-jay yesterday. Which, once you get used to the feeling of pressure, is not really painful. Just... weird. And a bit messy. So much lube! I've already dilated four times now, three sessions yesterday and once this moning, I've alredy got all but last dot inside me using the small orange dilator. Which my caregiver says is pretty amazing progress. I suspect my surgeon is less concerned about how deep or wide I get during the first weeek and only wants me to be regular about it. But I'm a psycho overacheiver, as we all know. My surgeon told me that I have some wound separation but it's minor, typical and boring. Boring is good, she says. Other pain is still manageable but never seems to go away completely. Could be worse so I'll live with it. I miss you all and hope to be back boosting and posting soon. But steady recovery is my priority right now. My caregiver will be leaving next week and I need to take care of myself soon. Everything else can wait. Love, Lisa 🤗💖

First, sorry about not posting an update yesterday after surgery, but it lasted about eight hours and I was really out of it afterwards. Second, the surgery was successful (thank Dog for robotic pull through!) but I needed two small skin grafts. Which means I’m confined to bed rest and as little movement as possible until Tuesday afternoon, a full five days, to give the grafts their best chance to “take” and begin healing. Third, I’m not in too much pain now unless I move the “wrong” way or I cough or sneeze. Those actions are definitely unpleasant, oh yeah. Otherwise pain is mild. I’m even able to sleep okay except when I’m woken for medications, taking vitals or emptying my various drains. Something that seems to happen every half hour to an hour. Fourth, thank you all for the wonderful and kind well wishes. They mean so much to me. Unfortunately, it’s not easy for me to respond personally to them now as typing this message on my phone took waaay too long. So please know that I love and appreciate you. 🤗🥰💖

ONE MORE DAY! Aaaand... I'm surprisingly calm. No I idea why. I still have some prep work to do today, but I'm not going to let it consume me. I plan on taking time for a long walk and playing some video games, too. Priorities. Also celebrating. Celebrating? You know, a personal celebration of International Men's Day while I might even be able to still pass as one. With my clothes off, at least. 😊 This one-girl party will, of course, include commemorative selfies of my junk. 😁 And, no, I won't be sharing any of those. For the archives only, my darlings. 🥰 Anyway, I hope you're all enjoying Transgender Awareness Week. I know I am. And I'm not oblivious to the fact that my surgery date falls of the Transgender Day of Remembrance. So don't just think about me tomorrow. Think about all our wonderful siblings who we've lost too soon. Their lives mattered. That's what's important. 🏳️‍⚧️✊

THREE MORE DAYS!!! Calm down? No, *you* calm down.

Yes, it's now only *ONE* damn week until "genital origami" surgery on November 20. And your girl here is freakin' the fuck out! I've been distracting myself as best I can to keep the scream building in my throat from escaping. (Although, I must say it will be a very femme sounding scream if it does. I mean, why not take the win when you can.) What have I been doing? Mostly it's been a blur of racing about trying to get my home prepared for recovery. Which includes turning my storage room into an actual bedroom for the full-time caregiver I hired. Who will only be with me for two weeks after I'm released from the hospital. And there have been soooo many things to buy! A crate of maxi pads, of course, but new gowns, new underwear, new furniture, protective covers for *old* furniture, ice-filled cold packs, freezer cold packs, pain killers, peri bottles, douche bottles, gauze pads, protective pads, so much goddamn lube, etc. It's a lot, really. Then there's learning all those exercises to keep your muscles from atrophying, diaphragmic breathing for relaxing to help pass the pee test, various stretches to prevent cramping without popping your stiches, etc. And I'm panicked that I'm doing a real shitty job at that learning! But thank Dog for video games and cringe comfort TV! They've been my refuge for the last few weeks and will likely continue to be that until it's time for the actual surgery. Also, thank Dog for Mastodon and all of you. I know you'll be here to tell me it's gonna all be okay. And know that I really appreciate that even though I don't always believe it. 🤗💖🤗💖🤗💖🤗💖🤗💖

Now it's exactly *TWO* weeks until "genital origami" surgery on November 20. To describe me as anxious and nervous would be an understatement. But I'm trying my best to get everything prepared and organized before that. While, of course, staying relaxed about it all. Because that is sooo easy. Yeah.

And now it's exactly *three* weeks away from va-jay-jay surgery on November 20. Not that I'm anxious, nervous or completely freakin' crazed about it. No, definitely not that. Carry on.

Aaaaand... today is exactly four weeks away from "genital origami" surgery (thanks, [@aisling](

Server of the Anarresti

Ashie (@aisling@anarres.family)

451 Posts, 176 Following, 144 Followers · 💚🏳️‍⚧️💜🏳️‍🌈 (Toots will self destruct... most are follower-readable only)
...

), for the new vocab!) on November 20. But far be it from me to start a countdown. Every week. Possibly every day during the last week. On no, Lisa's not like that at all. And definitely not... anxious or anything. I mean, what could freak me out any more than I am already, right?