>be me
>Continental Congress, July 1776
>Declaration of Independence finally done
>Jefferson spent weeks autisticly polishing every word
>Adams argued with everyone for months
>Franklin shitposted his way through edits
>now time to sign the thing
>traitors gonna get hanged if this goes south
>most delegates signing tiny, shaky little signatures
>barely legible, like they're scared King George gonna spot them from London
>John Hancock steps up
>absolute unit of a merchant chad
>president of Congress, richest guy in the room
>dips quill like he's about to drop the hottest mixtape of 1776
>signs his name
>massive
>ornate as fuck
>takes up like 5 inches of parchment
>loops and flourishes for days
>other founders staring
>"bro what the hell"
>Hancock leans back, smirks
>"His Majesty can read my name without spectacles"
>mic drop in 18th century
>rest of the signers suddenly feel inadequate
>some try to make theirs bigger but it's too late
>Hancock already mogged the entire document
>56 signatures total
>55 of them look like NPCs
>one looks like it was signed by God himself
>British officers later see the Declaration
>"who the fuck is this John Hancock guy thinking he is"
>his name becomes slang for "signature" forever
>literally signature mogged his way into immortality
>mfw Hancock's only real contribution was flexing on everyone with calligraphy
>mfw it worked
>mfw still the most famous signature in American history
>mfw the ultimate chad move was just having better handwriting
